One of the number one things most of us will be praying for on Rosh HaShana, the Jewish New Year, is happiness. Jewish joy (simcha) is the nectar that will enable us to have a sweet New Year.

But it’s not as easy as merely requesting happiness from G-d. We have to work hard and partner with G-d to advance spiritually. And the first step is a technique called “cheshbon hanefesh,” or “an accounting of the soul.”

Cheshbon hanefesh is a mussar (Jewish ethical) practice designed to help Jews analyze and improve their character traits. It can easily be tailored to help us become happier.

The first breakthrough to becoming happier is deeply analyzing our lives and discovering:

A. What really makes us happy, and…

B. The events that cause sadness, anger or hurt feelings.

For 2-3 days, use your mobile phone or a notebook to record your feelings throughout the day. You may be surprised, because often we don’t stop and really think about how the elements that comprise our daily routine make us feel.

Step 1: Make two lists: Happy and Sad. Every time something makes you happy, write it down. Do the same for events or interactions that upset you, make you sad or disrupt your happiness.

Step 2: After each interaction with a person, record it and write down whether you feel happy, sad or neutral.

Step 3: Record your Jewish mitzvot and spiritual practices throughout the day, and how they make you feel.

Step 4: At the end of the 2-3 day period, start analyzing the patterns to ask yourself how you can live a happier life. If you had multiple negative interactions with a specific person, what can you do to either improve that relationship or see that person less?

How can you increase the amount of time you spend on Jewish spiritual practices that make you happy, while improving your service so the practices that currently aren’t making you happy can be transformed? (Example: becoming more familiar with daily prayer for a deeper, more satisfying prayer experience).

Also, after analyzing your lists think about things that you aren’t doing regularly that may make you happier (exercise, community service, acts of kindness, etc.), and then begin integrating some of those activities into your daily routine.

Happiness is a worthy pursuit, but it won’t come magically or easily. The cheshbon hanefesh is a proven practice to help you experience simcha in the New Year.

Shana Tova! May you have a HAPPY New Year filled with many mitzvot, spiritual closeness, good health, friendship, love and success! Let’s continue to journey together towards greater simcha in this New Year…